Condé Nast Traveler magazine, don’t read this: I NEED TO STOP READING CONDE NAST TRAVELER MAGAZINE. It’s leading me to believe a regular ol’ average every-day vacation is sipping Chianti on a private island off the coast of Italy, paying a mortgage payment per night for a hotel. With all due respect to that periodical: lol no. Sallie Mae knocks on my door every month demanding half my net worth and I’m ballin’ on that millennial budget. That being said I don’t believe I should be confined to my own zip code year round just because our country has a massive student loan debt crisis. I just can’t go like, parachuting in Ibiza, or stay in hotels that have two dollar signs on Yelp.

You guys, have you heard of this new thing called Airbnb?

Kidding. But I played travel agent for you and found some seriously killer places under $150 a night (some are under $100!) and folks I am pleased to inform you they are all cute as shit.

Go forth and travel.

Whole Sunny SoMa Loft in San Francisco: I am physically, mentally, spiritually, attracted to spiral staircases, can anyone relate? I think I was a lighthouse keeper in a previous life. Moving on. Personally, I was not aware that you could get anything in San Francisco for under $100, so please excuse me while I pretend I am a Very Important Person in this swanky SoMa loft.

Modern Beach Container Home in Carolina Beach, North Carolina: Like The Boxcar Children meets your Beach House Pinterest board. It looks as though the boxcars even link too, so if you wanted to rent a bunch of them in a row with friends or family, that’s a thing. Steps away from the ocean? Doesn’t suck.

Gorgeous Loft in Historic Building in Detroit, Michigan: Dope, dope, dope, dope, dope. This building originally housed graphic artists for General Motors back in the day and now someone named Jesse has turned this into a loft that has its own hashtag, so you know it’s good.

Restored 1850’s Cabin in Decorah, Iowa: Here I was worried I’d go through my entire life and never get to cosplay as Laura Ingalls Wilder so thank fucking god. The owner’s name is “Loyal” (I love it???) so that feels like a money-back guarantee you’ll have an extremely pleasant time plus I have two words for you: Outdoor. Shower.

Warehouse Loft Apartment With Rooftop in Brooklyn: A beautiful white space! Plants! A rooftop! A picnic table that’s not outside! Stacked books as décor!* Very LMFAO voice* We’re in Brooklyn, trick! You guys this place can fit four people and is $94 a night. I don’t want to do any math because I might pull a muscle but that’s like only the cost of three Chipotle burritos per person.

Mongolian Yurt in the Gold Country in Colfax, California: (Sorry for all my non-Harry Potter heads out there) You know in HP when they go in what looks like a totally normal-looking camping tent and inside is like Glamping City? THAT IS PRETTY MUCH THIS. This not-far-from-Lake-Tahoe yurt seems to be part of a bigger spa facility which I’m just guessing since there are pools, hot tubs, onsite massages, and a sauna. Spoiler alert there is also GOLD PANNING so wow, I guess you can just get rich on your trip and then retire there? Cool.

Tucson Poet Studio in Tucson, Arizona: “What are you doing this weekend?” “Oh me? Oh, nothing, *voice becomes super light and breathy* just staying in a quiet Tucson Poet Studio crafted with sun-dried adobe, complete with a beehive fireplace. *Voice becomes normal again* You?” THIS PLACE IS $75/NIGHT SO BOOK IT BEFORE I DO.

Quiet Miami Oasis: What’re you just gonna go your whole life and not stay somewhere that has a disco ball hanging over the pool?! There are so many annoyingly cute details with this place it was hard to choose a leading photo but the pool situation is very, very key. There’s also a hot tub in a gazebo, a hot pink bench for your Instagram, and an adorable little RV to lay your head in between sun sessions.

Enchanting Artist’s Guest House in Venice, California: So my plan for this place is very simple it goes: “visit” and then just “don’t leave.” Imagine waking up in this eccentrically-tropical place EVERY. DAY. Apparently, the artist who designed this place is well known in the “elaborate glass” field?? Same. Dibs on the bed in the indoor plant garden.

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Images courtesy of linked sources