Each month, Wit & Delight will be introducing a new editorial theme. Blog posts from myself and contributors will be inspired by these themes and explored through words, visuals, pun, and articles. For weekly updates and additional content featuring our favorite finds from around the web-o-sphere, sign up for our email list. If you’d like to see a specific topic covered by our editorial team, comment below or please email hello@witanddelight.com. 

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Happy Monday! 2017 has proven to be a bit crazy, no? I will spare you the details but remind me to never take a red eye flight ever again. I was totally out of commission after we arrived home and slept until 11am the next morning. So much for getting home early for the sake of having more time to “be productive.”

Enough whining from me. How are you guys? How are those resolutions going? Are you diligently on track or are those self-imposed expectations slowly crushing your spirit? I’m happy to say 2017 was the first year I didn’t set resolutions. Before I get on my high horse, this revolt against resolution setting wasn’t intentional, at all. A busy holiday season followed me into the new year, and it seemed cruel to expect myself to adopt new habits when I’m operating in “just get enough sleep to stay alive” mode. Case in point: I’m still Christmas shopping for friends and family–hilarious considering we did full-blown gift guides on W&D. That’s how “together” I am right now.

Regardless of my togetherness, the absence of resolutions made me wonder if saying “to hell” with them is a healthier approach to betterment. While most resolutions are broken within 31 days of the new year, experts say forming new habits should only take two weeks. So why are we failing after this magical two week mark? When I look back at my own resolutions, the only ones that stuck were fueled by my so-called “good” character traits, like the tendency to obsess and indulge in perfectionism. My resolutions had two outcomes: failure or complete obsession. Both will give you this nasty hangover most mental health professions like to call “shame.” Shame sucks.

My point is this: do we have to shame ourselves into adopting new behaviors or is there a healthier way to seek personal growth?

When our internal monologue is filled with “shoulds” and “coulds” and “wants,” we’re not allowing headspace for “needs” and “loves” and “musts.” So, that’s what we’re talking about this month. Instead of discussing ways to better ourselves, we’re going to look for ways to say “Hey, I’m not so bad at X” or “Hey, I’m done caring what anyone says about Y.”  When we’re good to ourselves, it’s easier to be honest about what we truly enjoy, need, and love.

So. January is Love Thy Selfie month.

We focus on our shortcomings because we believe they stand in the way of loving ourselves. Sadly, being five pounds lighter isn’t going to fix low self-esteem. Getting that promotion won’t fix your imposter’s syndrome. Contentment is intrinsically and irrevocably intertwined with our sense of self. It’s the one thing you can’t escape. Getting to know yourself is part of living and it ends when… you know, we’re done living. A life well-lived, to me, means spending more time on earth feeling content with myself and my contributions than not.

I can’t promise you’ll find peace, contentment, and happiness from our thoughts around the concept of self-love, but I do hope you find a little relief from self-imposed expectations and gain a better sense of who you really are. Sometimes it may feel like tough love, and sometimes it may make you feel warm and fuzzy inside. Being kind to yourself is harder than it appears.

A few topics we’ve been kicking around:

– Pride and Prejudice in the Instagram Era: It’s Not Them; It’s You
– Family, Fitness, Friends, Sleep, Work: Take Your Pick, Because You Can’t Have Them All
– Follow Thy Pleasure: To Know What Thy Loves, Thy Must Admit What Thy Loathes
– Smoke & Mirrors: I’m Not Martha Stewart and Neither Is She
– Owning It: 10 Reasons You’re Doing Better Than You Think
– I See You, Imposter Syndrome
– “I Was Just Checking In” and Other Phrases to Banish
– Need vs. Wants: Our Handy Dandy Worksheet for Positive Pursuits
– True Life: I Married a Lifestyle Blogger (Joe Peter’s editorial debut!)

If you haven’t already, please sign up for our email list! The first newsletter comes out this Friday.  I’m telling you all so I finally get my butt moving on it!

Kate Arends

Kate is the founder of Wit & Delight. She is currently learning how to play tennis and is forever testing the boundaries of her creative muscle. Follow her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.